Improved - Hotspot - Writing

Welcome Viewers to my blog,


This blog is the same as the other writing one but this one is improved by Miss D. I will try to continue with the story and I'll think of more ideas. Make sure you leave a comment because I need help with ideas so its easier. Also give me some language features idea so I could add more descriptive writing.

Miss D help me improved it a little bit so some of the writing is checked. Next time I'll do the The Most Dangerous Prompt Generator again and make another one. Leave a comment if you want to see it on my blog.

Here is my writing


He hadn't seen anything like it in twenty years of teaching. The door said crack as the door open. “Cracking” An old woman entered the room she looked like she was smiling at me while I was teaching.


"Umm, Who are you." I said, "Are you here to pick us someone or are you a visitor."


She looked at me smiling. People in class turned pale waiting for me to make a move and kick her out. Everyone held their breath trying to move but couldn't. As I held my breath a desk sounded like the students. All of my joyful students tried to say an excuse but didn’t get the confidence to say it. Tears came down thought Petra’s eyes as she wiped it off and ask me a question.


"Umm Teacher," Petra said looking pale, "Can I go to the bathroom"


"Okay but come back quickly," I cried.


"Fine I'll try to be quick,"


Thank you for reading my blog post. Please leave a comment and please give me some more feedback to help me with my blog.

The Most Dangerous Promt - Writing - Hotspot

Welcome Viewers to my blog, 

Today Miss D told us about the site https://www.squibler.io/writing-prompt-generator/. We only have 3 seconds to write something or else it will black out. We only have to write 5 minutes because its easier to think of more idea. And Its hard to see if we did something wrong because you have to write a word every 3 seconds. Once I get feedback from Miss D I will fix the errors.

Here Is My Amazing Writing

The Most Dangerous Prompt Generator 

He hadn't seen anything like it in twenty years of teaching. An old woman entered the room she looked like she was smiling at me while I was teaching.

"Umm, Who are you." I said "Are you here to pick us someone or are you a visitor." 

She looked at me smiling. People in class turned pale waiting for me to make a move and kick her out. Everyone held their breath trying to move but couldn't.

"Umm Teacher," Petra Said Looking Pale "Can I go to the bathroom," 

"Okay but come back quick," I cried

"Fine I'll try to be quick," 

I hope you enjoyed my blog post. If you want me to carry on with the story please comment. Thanks.

Sincerely Aaron

Exactly 100 Words Challage

Welcome Viewers Again,

I just want to say sorry because I haven't been posting on my blog in a little while. Its because I was busy doing stuff in the holidays. But I posted one weekly words so I'm going to post something about my holidays. And I also missed a weekly words blog post last week so sorry again.


Today Miss D today at writing made us do 100 words challenge. My story is Exactly 100 words again I checked this time. We were wring about being in the rain and a grey car approached us. We need to add strong words, vocabulary, adjective, hyperbole and onomatopoeia. And by the way the title and the to be continued does not count as words.


Here is my story

100 Word Challenge

Week 1

“I shouldn’t have come here. Now I’m lost!”

Beeeeeeb! As a grey car approached out of nowhere. I barely recognise it as it pulled up.

“Hop in,” The Man said.

The car had one wheel exposed to the rain rusting it. The other wheels look very old.
The car window was pitch black so I couldn’t see inside the car.
I felt disillusioned what waited for me. The dirty seat that was never been cleaned before. 

“I’m sitting on that thing!”

“Your choice get yourself even more lost in this country and die of sickness, or come in.”

“Umm Uhhh,”

To Be Continued

Thanks for reading my blog post. Don't forget to comment and sorry for not posting in a while.

Time Travel - Hotspot

Welcome Viewers,


The last time we posted a hotspot was week 5. Now we are writing about this image. We can write it like a video game, in the future a dream and more. My one is about time travel because it looks like the future. Some people added aliens or even things that doesn't exist.



Here is my time travel story



“Hey let's go down the steep hills, we might find some enemies.”


“Are you sure they are in Planet Earth 3082?”

“You mean year 3082 not Planet Earth 3082?” I said


“Maybe they are at year 1777 because they want to change the future and 1777 people might learn

how to time travel before 4209 in Planet New Earth. “


“Okay then let’s go down the steep hills.” I said


We carefully slid down because it was very dangerous. We saw some of our enemies. We slid down

quietly then we fired our gun like a volcano. We fired as hard as we could but they blasted us back up.

I tumbled down spinning like crazy on the other side of the steep, high mountains.


“Guys keep shooting them with the 20912Po26 one shot gun.” I said when I was still falling “Make sure

you call back up so we can take the most wanted criminals back to prison.”





…………………………………………………...…………………………………………………...





“Wha wha what happend? Looks like back up came to save me before I touched the ground,” I said.


“Did you get them?”


"No they went to year 98 two qa 9.” They said “The planet is pronounced as 98 two qa 9. Make sure that you say it right before time travelling there.”

“Okay so it is 98 two qa 9,” I said.


“Yeah have you been there?” One of the cops asked.


“Yup a lot of times. Okay we need to get him in this holographic cage that works. I invented it in 2989.”


“Hey how do you live that long?”


“Well I also invented a thingy thats stop us from growing. We can change age or just stop ageing. I also
created it in the same year as the holographic cage.”

“Wow you are so old. Okay then let's go quickly. We must go quickly before they go too far and ruin the future.”

“98 two qa 9 time!”


Blinding light flashed into my eyes as we time travelled to 98 two qa 9. When we arrived my team was
trapped in a fureturerisic wall.


“Hey! Boss the squad of criminals tricked him into trapping us,”


“Hey it’s the time police from Planet Earth 4502, we come to capture Gpo 92 and his criminal squad,”

the chief said.


“What do you mean bad guy?! He told me that he is the real time police and you are the fake one.”


“Look at this licence,” one of the cops said. “Its a real one from 4502, he is lying, set them free.” he
pointed at my team

“Okay he is at 9826 wa peak street.”


“Run before he does damage,” I said loundy.


We ran to the street 9687 wa peak street which was close to 9826 wa peak street. We saw the time


travel police station so we made a stop.


“Hey time police from 98 two qa 9.”


“Yeah why are you asking?”

“We are the time police from 4502 and we just wanted criminals on the loose. They are in a squad of 13, have you seen them?”


“No but show me your licences.”


“Here. But do you know where Aaron is?”


“I’m here!” I screamed.


“No I meant you in the future because you created a machine that you can’t age up.” The chief said.


“Oh yeah,” I said

“Yup he is here. He was the one who finally send it to the public and he got over 5 Quintilian. I thought it wasn't possible, but it was for you.”


“Okay can you please send the squad to live sentences, it’s because he is hard to capture.” I said


“Okay rich master from the past.” He said


“Umm chief,”

“Yes,”


“Why do you want to see the future me?”


“Ummm, I just wanted to get the machine. The stop age thingy machine, that's why I want to see the future you.”


“Okay, we will travel back to 4502. By the way, send him to your prison when you capture him.”


“Okay boss,” He said excited to meet me in person.

As we time traveled back I diced to finally sell and make the stop ageing thiny. Which I now called the stop ageing inator. When I sold my first one I made lots of people coming to me asking for more copies.



“Looks like I could have sold it when I finished working prototype. I fully invented it in 2989. I could have made more money if I just sold it,” End Quote.


Thank you for reading my blog post. Please leave some comments. Anyways bye!


Kind Regards Aaron

Contrast and Compare - Hotspot Week 5

Welcome Viewers to my blog,


I will show you my hotspot work. We have to compare the sneakers and pair of scuffs. After that we have to contrast which is find the different. After that we have to do a conclusion. Then we are done.

Here is my work

Week 5

Compare and Contrast

Contrast: 

Despite, However, Yet, Rather, Instead, Otherwise, Even though

Compare: 

Likewise, As well as, Either, Similarly, In the same way

Compare and contrast the two styles of footwear. Start with this sentence

and finish the other two. Add your own compare and contrast sentences.

Introduction:  Today we are looking at a pair of sneakers and a pair of scuffs.

Compare: The sneakers are soft warm on your feet. Similarly, the scuffs are

soft and warm too.

Contrast: Instead of having shoe lace like the sneakers, the scuffs have

Velcro which are easier to put on.

Conclusion: I think that the scuffs are the better choice because they are
soft and warm and easy to put on. Because they don’t need shoe laces.

Thank for you reading my blog post. Please don't heisted to comment. We are now at 96 blog post so far.

Language Feature - Onomatopoeia

Welcome Viewers to my blog,


I'm going to share with you my writing that is written by bullet points. We've done this on our Collaborative Writing Document. Its sometimes lag so that why I couldn't post this on time. We are working on Language feature. Language feature is:  Something special or different made with words. Our Language feature is Onomatopoeia.


We are wring onomatopoeia which is sounds written in words. Like Achoo, Ahem, Arf, Arghh, Bang, Bark, Boo, Brrng, Bump, Buzz, Cackle, Chatter, Cheer, Clap, Clank, Click, Crackle, Crash, Crunch, Ding-Dong, Drip, Eek, Fizz, Flipflop, Growl, Haha, Hiccup, Honk, Howl, Hush, Jingle, Jangle, Knock, Lala, Meow, Moan, Moo, Murmur, Neigh, Oink, Plop, Poof, Pop, Pow, Psst, Quack, Ribbit, Ring, Roar, Rustle, Rumble, Shhh, Sizzle, Slap, Smash, Smack, Squish, Swoosh, Thud, Thump, Tick-Tock, Whisper, Whimper, Woof, Zip, Zoom and more. An example of an onomatopoeia is "The man was holding a gun and shot up the sky, BANG!" We are going to check out another language feature next week maybe. Its called Personification. Okay its now time for my writing.

Here is my writing

I walked to the 800 meter race track waiting for the guy in the yellow jacket to Position me.
He was the guy who was also starting the race. He told us in a clear voice and the man in
the yellow jacket fired a shot his staring gun up the sky. ‘Crash!’ I dashed my way into first
place running and sweating. The audience was cheering loudly “Go go go go!” The commentator
was talking in loud l voice. I kinda slowed down a little after I got tired. The loud thundering behind
me as my breeze in the air. My heart was breathing fast and the other racers puff their breath at
my back. I got slower but the other racers were far, I did it! I ran to the finish line and won the 800
meter track. I did it again. The other racers feet were thudding fast to the finish line. I puff and sat
down on the chair and rest. 

I am running an 800 meter track race

I can hear:

• I walk to the starting line waiting for the guy wearing the yellow jacket, he was the one who was
• starting the race. 
• He was putting us in the right position so it would be fair.
• The race starter shot the sky and a loud bang happen.
• The audience cheering -  Go Go Go! Name Go!
• I dash my way into first place
• The commentator talking
• I was running in fast speed then I slowed a little bit.
• The people’s feet behind me was thudding behind me. 
• My heart was beating as the other racer’s puffing their breath behind me.
• I was getting slower and slower but I made it first place again.

• The End Of The Race

Don't forget to give me feedback. Also don't heisted to do it. thanks.

Showing NOT Telling

Welcome Viewers to my blog,

In room 6 we have been doing showing not telling sentences for a while now. We did this so we can improve our writing if we are writing a story.



The techniques is don't tell the emotion or you are telling. If you want to show you need to make it like this. But my shock sentence has 'shock' because Miss D said I was struggling a lot so I get tell once. After that I got a hang of it so I could write story's showing the emotion.



Here is the sentence that is corrected by Miss D

Show                                                                                                                       Tell 

Bailey was happy.
Jeremy was shocked.

Bailey was smiling in excitement. He ran because he couldn’t walk because he was so excited, instead he ran.

Jeremy stood still in shock. His stomach rumbling like he hasn’t eaten in a while, and his mouth opened wide.

Thank you for reading mu blog post. Could I have some feedback for me to read and comment. Also please reply. Thanks!

What We See In This Image

Welcome Viewers back to my blog,

Room 6 is trying to do what we learnt for writing in term 2. We have to write what we see in this image We can't add things like a boat because its not in the image. We also have to start the sense with 'The.' So we have to make it with the 5 sense Hear, Emotion, See, Feel, Taste, Touch, Etc, Etc. I had some trouble so I only made 3.

Here is the image



Here is the sentence

Find five things related to the senses to describe in this image.
Start each one with ‘The…’

1. The struck out of nowhere with frightening force. - Emotion

2. The lightning stuck the water burning the ocean. - See

3. The lightning was building a loud thunder! Hear

Thank you for reading my blog post. Please leave some feedback for me to comment and read.

Haunted house

Welcome to my blog,

In room 6 we get to do some free writing. I wrote about a scary story of a free house. I'm still working on my vocabulary. I tried to put a lot of vocabulary in my story.

Here is my goal

Vocabulary -Use the correct words to fit the genre I am using

Here my scary story

I was playing games at 12 am, then I heard something outside. I went outside no one was there.

10 hour earlier

I look online, then I saw a free house. I wanted it so I pack my stuff. I check my phone if it was charged and ready to go. I didn’t have that much stuff.

When I arrive I saw a neighbour, he was welcoming me. He told me why I picked this house. I laugh. When I arrived I saw the owner She was a woman, she was old. She gave me a bag with pie. It said it was from Charlotte. I was going to say thank you but she left.I set up all of my things, and my wifi. The wifi only cost 10c. The was weird but it was powerful. I ate the pie that Charlottle gave me. It was yummy. I ate all of it then got full. When it was 3pm I went to take a bath. The door was opening, I told who ever was in my house to ‘GET OUT!’ But no one speak, I hesite. When I finished my bath I went up stairs. Then sleep.

9 hour later

I woke, I check my watch. It was 12AM! I thought I was playing games. Maybe I was dreaming.

“Hel’”

Then I heard a noise outside. I walked outside but no one was there I hesitate. Then I woke up again. I was sleepy so I went back to sleep. When I slept I saw a creepy dream. When I was sleeping I heard a noise from the attic. I walked up stairs to the attic then saw Charlotte. Her skin was green as a zombie holding the pie she gave me I hesitate. I shivers down the stair and I fell! Then I woke up. I heard the same noise in my dream. But I refuse to go up stairs. I stayed in my bed for hours without sleeping. Then when it was day I ran to the neighbour who welcome me. I told him where is Charlotte? He looked at me. He said.

“There is no Charlottle here. She died in the house you are living in. But she is famous for her pie.”

I hesitate. Then ran to my house. I was ready to pack everything. I packed everything in 4 minutes and drive to the library. I used my laptop and find a different house. I saw a house for 400 hundred dollar. I brought it and rent a one day hotel.

The next day I woke up and went to my new house. It looked awesome in the outside. But the inside was empty. The toilet, the heat pump and the oven was there. I was waiting for my heavy stuff to arrive so I played on my I pad. My I pad have a lot of game, and a lot of offline games. I played for 15 minutes, then my stuff arrived. I went outside, then I told everyone on the truck to help me move my stuff. I help a man name Mason. He was bring my bed to me room. While the others put my stuff where I told them. When we were done I watched some TV. I went to YouTube and watch some funny videos. I really want to get rid of my fear of the free haunted house.

The End?

Was it scary? What if you were in this situation buying a house. Can I have feed back?

Dreams Falls

Welcome to my blog,

Today I have been working on my vocabulary. We have to write something using our goals

Here is my goal

Vocabulary -Use the correct words to fit the genre I am using

 Here my awesome writing.

Dreams falls

Chapter one ‘Fall Asleep’

“Ahh, looks like I need to drink some milk.”

I went to the kitchen and drank some milk. Then I was a little bit sleepy.
So I went to my room and It was clean and tidy like a shining star.
I walked to my bed and checked where is my basketball.
I went to check under my bed. When I looked I saw my lost phone.
I finally found it, I was surprised that my phone was under my bed the whole time.
I place my phone on my charging desk and charge it.
When I went to my bed I fell asleep. Then I woke up.

Chapter 2 Freddy Krueger Dream Nightmare!

I checked my house if anyone was inside. Then I checked my watch it said 11:00 pm.
I woke up 3 second when I slept. Then my tv turned on, then the movie played. Freddy Krueger!

“I think he is in my house! Please Krueger please. Don’t. Kill. Mee.

‘AHRR!’

“Ahh!”

Then I hesitate. Then ran to the kitchen. Then I saw the note I hang to get rid of him. He can't hit me if I
don't fear him. So l Laugh at him again and again. He was annoyed. So I keep laughing

"Stop it," Freddy screamed.

Then he disappeared. My dream was falling apart. Then I waked up in my room with my.
I look at my TV it was off.

“Ahhh! Wait what?? Was that only a dream?”

I checked my watch. It was 1:16 am. It took me 1 hour and 6 minutes to wake up.

“Was it all a dream?”

The End?

Thank you for reading my scary story I made. What if you were in situation. What will you do?
Can I have some feedback how scary was it?